He never seems to leave her
because she lives inside;
the pleasant and the hard
and all the shades between.

Touch me,
move me,
hamper me,
heal me;
complicit in where I am today—
where I am tomorrow
if I’ll let.

To choose because of you;
to choose despite you;
you appear as you will
something to relish or leave.







‘I love you’ rings in my head

Thinking of how many times I’ve heard them

Those words, they appear in me now and again

Whether you’re here or some where

‘I love you,’ rings in my head

We are the result of information processing

So there was some information processing within and between a certain man and a certain woman: as a result, you were born. 

Hence, we are information embodied. 

Who we are;  
What we become;  
How we act;  
What we will do;  
All that is information,  
And the result of information processing.  

Randomness and Free Will

Is history, destiny? Is the will capable of arbitrary decisions despite our past experiences? The justice system must believe it is, otherwise, the ‘excuse’ of poor upbringing, bad friendships, accidental opportunities for misbehaviour … may be tenable for reduced sentences.

According to Dr. Stephen Wolfram in his book, ‘A New Kind of Science,’ there are three mechanisms for randomness. In the context of the randomness of the outputs of our volition, we have,

Mechanism 1:
There are continuously and variously applied trips and taunts; in some sense, stochastic inputs throughout a sequence of volitional events or progression of will.
The continuous taunts have ‘led’ to some people choosing, wittingly or not, to behave (ir)rationally, land some other person a theoretical jab, appreciate the simplest of things etc.

Mechanism 2:
There’s an initial input, and that’s all.
Like the smile from his wife before he went off to war. He’d better come back alive. Or a traumatic experience that leads to a fixation or a mind that says something like, “I shall never eat cupcakes again.”

Mechanism 3:
Intrinsic randomness. A case where there is no input, but there is output.
The system (or person) comes up with its own madness, or coolness, or mad genius, or whatever. It generates its own output, independent, or regardless of extraneous signals and previously reached conclusions.

The third mechanism properly marks free will, I think. Sounds a little crazy to speak of outputs with no inputs, but maybe we can identify with it. Your experience probably says so. And though acausal actions seem like God’s prerogative, we’re made in His likeness, right?

Three examples of landmark free will events are the sin by Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden; the devil saying that he wanted to overthrow God; and the birth of Jesus Christ. Have any positive personal examples?

We are free to will what we will; to will what we think; and to think what we will: The will can will anything it wills.

Although we may have little control over extraneous signals, that we could generate our own suggestions internally tells us that we could counter or enhance these signals; that we could create our own stream of consciousness to make for a healthy soul — if we will.

Sex — A series of questions

To be aware and mindful of our feelings and thoughts as they evolve, is, in part, to answer some of these questions. To channel our thoughts and feelings where we choose, is also, in part, to answer some of these questions.

What is sex
What is it for
What does it mean
   If it means anything

Does sexual intimacy amount to sex
Doesn’t it
Is it an act of marriage
Isn’t it

Is sex like a recreational sport
Would it mean anything to us
Is it as a hobby
Would it mean something to us

What could it do to one’s mind and will
What could it do to one’s feelings
What does it do to one’s body

God, why all the sweetness with sex
Why is there a link with conception

Is the sex of adultery the same as the sex of marriage
Is premarital sex different from marital sex
Is sex just sex in any context

Does one suffer loss for being single and virgin
Isn’t that virtue
What does sex say
Would it say any thing of one

They haven’t had sex in 45 years
Isn’t sex necessary in marriage
Is it spice we can live without

And there’s more.

Do we see sex as worship
Is it sacred
   An immersion
   A baptism

Inquiring minds want answers. Tempted souls need answers.
How do we handle our fallibility?
What is true even where we know only in part?

We may find that we have no answers to some of the questions. We may find that we can’t precisely say why we’ve chosen some of our answers. We may have defaulted to some authority’s opinions and adopted them as ours. If you find that you want to adopt an authority, you’d probably discover the most stable and consistent answers in some principles elaborated in the Bible. You’ll find scenes from real life soaps: Hosea asked by God to marry a wife of porneia, David stealing an officer’s wife (after he had slept with her and got her pregnant) and sending him to his death etc. You’ll find wise sayings in the Proverbs, and sweetly intimate words between lovers in Songs of Solomon. King Solomon himself was seemingly sexually prolific, with 700 wives and 300 concubines. The way the Bible is able to answer all the questions of life in a finite volume is by dwelling on principles. The principles, in my opinion, are more important than what seem to be the straight answers, particularly in the Old Testament. The New Testament highlights and explains a number of those principles and derives direct answers from them.

The Plight of Citizenship

The plight of citizenship is this: that the whole is always greater than the sum of its parts. If this were not the case, nationhood, hence citizenship, would not exist. And when the citizens, i.e., that ‘parts,’ move to change the whole, whether or not the whole (nation) changes, they remain citizens and subjected to the collective’s tyranny by presence and belonging.

Slaves, yet free.

By being born into a nation (or tribe, family …), one is forced into subjection—or slavery even—to the organization and operations of that nation. One is automatically stamped with an identity driven by the expectations and experiences of others; by peoples of the same or other nations.

The guardians and ambiance then puts one through a process of transformation and acclimation, to, unwittingly or otherwise, shape the modelled citizen. We all had few choices because we had to be cared for—our first few years.

And however volitional and voluntary an individuals identification with any nation may be, or subsequently become, there’s always embedded within it that element of training, and of an innate/imbibed love for one’s origins.

Slaves, yet free.

Side Notes/Thoughts
Train up a child in the way he should go.

Make yourselves slaves of righteousness—godness. Paul said in Romans 6. It’s a good master …
so that it is not as though we’ve lost our liberty, but rather that we have gained ourselves.

Then elsewhere he says:
All things are lawful to me but not all things are necessary/expedient;
all things are lawful to me but I will not be brought under the power of any;
all things are lawful to me but not all things make me a better person.
(1 Corinthians 6:12, 10:23)

One context should be obvious: that our liberty isn’t an occasion to kill ourselves, or souls. Rather, it is to live in the preservation of human dignity (of self, and of others), in the discovery and promotion of truth, and in the experience and communication of the divine presence in love.