I need you — Just because

I need you because I want you;
the converse could be stressful.

I want you because I want to love you;
I want to love you because—just because.

Je ne sais quoi.

God does not appear to need man;
yet he lives and acts as though he does—just because.

To Call Oneself is to Find One’s Calling

To call oneself to a calling,
isn’t that how many folks have found their calling?
For to discover one’s calling is to accept one—to choose it.

If a person lets go of, or loses, their raison d’être, that person has chosen to leave a life and associated living, for another—perhaps untold—one. That amounts to a change in living that is also of calling.

A person’s raison d’être, whether inherited or learned, determined or undiscovered, or chosen even, forms a dynamo that propels them in their calling. Whether or not ones quest for their life calling or purpose is driven by religion or faith, it is certain that they’re living their calling now, even before they’ve found that calling to move to. You can change your calling.

For many, their calling has simply been to deal with life as it comes; to make the most of living, per time and per chance. They simply live their calling.

To call oneself is to find one’s calling;
for to purpose oneself, is to choose ones call.

A love-hate-love relationship (View 2)

At first it was easy,

then it became a little challenging.

Things had slowed down.

A little later with a spurt of will,

he picked up pace and continued,

seeking to be diligent;

the same and different.

It felt harder.

First she loved him;

then she hated him.

And then again she loved him

and hated him after that;

even more so a little later.

Then she loved him again;

coming to hate him eventually some time later.

And finally, she loved him,

accepting her choice.

Demanding persistence, he gave it that;

until he hit a brick wall

and kind of got quenched.

He came back again to climb over

in a breakthrough;

going on for a while

and slowly getting weary.

Finally he let go to say,

“I love you anyways.”

‘I love you’ rings in my head

Thinking of how many times I’ve heard them

Those words, they appear in me now and again

Whether you’re here or some where

‘I love you,’ rings in my head

The Marriage Proposal

I commit to have with you only
Oneness
Of spirit and soul and body
Oneness
Of living
Oneness
Of life
Oneness
Of possession
Oneness
Of fellowship
Oneness
If you would have me similarly
And so choose to marry me
We’ll seal it before the Spirit
By our word and our heart

The Happiness of Commitment

One of the purest, or truest, expressions of love is commitment. What’s romantic in the modern sense about commitment? Sounds dry compared to passion, and laughter, and fun, and ….
It says in a way that love may not be sweet all the time, but still pleasing, regardless. It agrees that feelings matter, but are not everything. Inside commitment, we find care, respect, knowledge, and responsibility. Foundation for a lifetime of bliss; happiness, if you will.

‘Spanked my children sometimes, yet they run to me every time. Sometimes I feel that they see much more than I could, or would, having grown up and all. I want to be as a kid again. Their eyes are one with their hearts. And the light of love comes out of them so bright that I wonder; I could almost cry for joy for the sight of such beauty. Love is beautiful. I am happy for it.

They see me or their mother changing their diapers in the fellowship of the perfume of ‘pu.’ They see love. We instruct, correct, train, shout, ground, support, hail, carry … And they see love. We go out and come home: it’s all love. I am happy for it.

It was exciting when they met; they could barely keep away from each other for any length of time. They tied the knot, children followed, …. He owned her; she owned him; both of them slaves to their commitment. Where is the love? It is here, in who we are now. I am happy for it.

If we let go of some joys, it was to great joy because it came out of love. We have a new happiness despite the daily grind. It has come with its own excitement and reward. You will see it clearly if you want to be one. It will be ‘easy’ because you are one; there shall be no regrets. Perfect love, the great book says, sets all fears aside. … For you did not receive a spirit of fear, but of power, of love, and of wise discretion. [1 John 4:18, 2 Tim 1:7]

Will her tummy not go back in?

He being the only one to behold and ‘appreciate’ the whole natural glory of her body, there might have been a feeling of resignation in his words, “I am stuck with the daily sight of this awesome woman whether or not she retains her shape after childbirth.”

Yet this same man, if not his wife, would likely be wanting another baby in about three years. And both their parents might ask questions if their second grandchild from the couple appears to be coming late. Three years is late already. 

The times are changing though.

But what does a man do if his wife ceases to be eye candy for him in the sense of eye candy, lust apart.

Now he doesn’t mind his wife getting fatter or fleshier (he is properly African, afterall), it’s just the protruding tummy. A little is okay, but not ‘that’ much. Yes, he knows he’s going nowhere, and that, by principle; hence, the sign of resignation in his jocular lament. 

Is there more for him to do than to encourage her nicely and out of love…. He has settled with the plot he chose to build his home in, like a real, mature, man on that front. Even if he married her for her body, he is married to her, and that counts for everything. Commitment is love.

I hope it is not that you are comparing your wife with other women. There’s no basis for comparison really: she’s the wife, so the others are not. Besides, their bodies and  histories are different. Ah, he just wants his hottie back (as if she had been away).

But what does a woman do, think, say. Particularly if ‘the one’ is almost making a fuss? Maybe he’s not.

He still likes you to look pretty that way in his eyes. Throwing tantrums like a spoilt child. He is crying over spilled milk, you don’t have to join him. Things would go from good to bad if you felt sorry and sad for what came beside that bundle of joy, your baby. And what if the fattening came by itself? Haha, the blessing of marriage. It is something to laugh about.

You have a little belly sir. I know. It’s nice, isn’t it. My wife loves to rub it. Hmm, why don’t you rub hers? …It doesn’t work both ways man. That’s like stand the earth on its head; unimaginable.

He wants you; only you. Not some other woman, however flat-bellied, tight and shapely, well-sized where it matters, fresh looking, and totally tantalising in a bikini she might look. Em, okay, I’d like think that that is true. It’s comforting at the very least.

But he looked … Haha, you would catch some men giving mannequins a second look. Not funny though, if it happens more than once. He might be trekking towards losing the plot, so a smack and a reminder might be helpful. Whack! What? “I’m helping you stay focused on what matters: me.” He has a sense of serious humour.

So some women delay marriage and childbirth because of ‘fashion.’ …. Some opt out entirely. A friend says she wants only one, for whatever reason. Many others say ‘what the heck’ and trudge on, walking barefeet and free. 

Her home is now a gym, because biology often needs help. Regardless, he’s a pillar that will always be there. Kind of like God in a way. I love you; I know it everyday.