It was in the life of Mary
To give birth a virgin
Mother of Jesus
How was that not impossible
Questions to answers we may never fully know
That her hymen was not pierced
Not first by the phallus of a man
When she conceived her child
Relating orally
Petting to keep in virginity
Not the problem of a man
As it slipped through the crack
Artificially inseminated
She lost her virginity
Delivered of a baby
He never seems to leave her
because she lives inside;
the pleasant and the hard
and all the shades between.
Touch me,
move me,
hamper me,
heal me;
complicit in where I am today—
where I am tomorrow
if I’ll let.
To choose because of you;
to choose despite you;
you appear as you will
something to relish or leave.
Love.
Experience.
People.
Choices.
Living.
Memories.
Some things want to set we right;
Others, to leave we bereft.
But life,
Which direction is well?
Trust: a dangerous game
That we play every day
To become less insane
Lest we cease to seem sane
At first it was easy,
then it became a little challenging.
Things had slowed down.
A little later with a spurt of will,
he picked up pace and continued,
seeking to be diligent;
the same and different.
It felt harder.
First she loved him;
then she hated him.
And then again she loved him
and hated him after that;
even more so a little later.
Then she loved him again;
coming to hate him eventually some time later.
And finally, she loved him,
accepting her choice.
Demanding persistence, he gave it that;
until he hit a brick wall
and kind of got quenched.
He came back again to climb over
in a breakthrough;
going on for a while
and slowly getting weary.
Finally he let go to say,
“I love you anyways.”
She had felt so in love with him
It seemed like the feeling was mutual
They had a flow like soulmates
As one before they became one
One indeed afterwards in the closest bond
Their marriage seemed certain to come
But one day life hit her hard—bad
Her heart was cracked by the man of her heart
The meaning inherent in her feelings was left hanging
No route to any end, dangling
She wanted to die—not literally
The story she had lived in was getting unwritten.
A beautiful story had come to frozen
Nooooooo!!
That wouldn’t cover the effusion of emotion
It was much too much to hold
it had to show
…
No longer looking to fall in love;
All she wanted was sense and decency.
That rapport and spontaneity that consumed her previously ceased to mean anything
It had lost its appeal after the jolt—the jilt
A man came up to her one day
He seemed okay….
No flow and glow
Yet good as okay would go
Sane and decent
She said yes when he proposed
There were no bells and whistles
She wasn’t swept of her feet
Not like she was into him
Feet firmly on the ground and eyes wide open
She had said yes and moved on
Satisfied with her choice
She would give her life but not her heart.
It had been wrapped in a cold blanket
It was a while…
When one day she realised she was liking him especially
A love with emotion was budding
And a warm feeling inside growing
Rules that others make for us
Rules that we’ve made for ourselves
Rules we follow with our heads
Rules we follow from our hearts
Rules we do not care to honour
Rules we care not to dishonour
Rules that are made because they could be broken
Rules that exist because they should be followed
Rules that are because truth is
Rules that are because truth is ignored
Less bright and loud
More strong and deep
Neither open nor hidden
There lingering
A happiness
Me contented
…
